« TONY SNOW IS VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU | Main | CHALMERS JOHNSON HAS SEXY BRAINS »
Thursday, March 22, 2007
I, IDIOT
I wrote a really fantastic blog this morning concerning my batshit lunatic theory about how Phil de Vellis was just the Lee Harvey Oswald for a vast Hollywood conspiracy to reshape the world of political propaganda, own the election frame and embugger policy, Texas-style. I based this on the contention that the production values on that 1984 Hilary ad were so awesome, there's no way he could have created it in his living room on a Sunday afternoon.
Well, Steven called me up and schooled me on the fact that the ad was a re-conditioned old Apple commercial, so that blew my whole bonkers theory out of the water. In my defense, my ADD was so severe in 1984, I was unable to sit through an entire commercial.
So I yanked it. Christ. GAWKER would have been all over that boner like a fat girl bachelorette party at Chippendale's.
In the words of the immortal Emily Litella: "Oh!......Never mind."
Did you enjoy this post? Use the wonders of social bookmarking to share it with friends and the Internet hive-mind!
del.icio.us
Digg it
reddit
Google
StumbleUpon- Hide Comments for I, IDIOT (14)
COMMENTS
I'm still laughing, but with you, not at you. Okay, at you just a little. S'truth, we're not getting any younger and it's time to start thinking about cutting our meth with Aricept.
Posted by: steven at March 22, 2007 10:32 AM
Yeah, I'm laughing at me too, particularly since I was so PROUD of that one. I was going to go to de Vellis' Huffington Post article and link to it in the comments and everything.
God, it sucks being blonde sometimes.
Posted by: Cintra Mc USS Abraham-Lincoln III at March 22, 2007 10:49 AM
You go to print with the Slunky you have, not the Slunky you want. I suppose we could just start posting bits with factual errors full of partisan rage and indignation, but Fox and NewsMax aren't hiring.
Posted by: steven at March 22, 2007 11:00 AM
Factual errors, schmactual errors.
Hey, if I had been right about that thing, I totally would have been right about that thing. I wish I had any credibility at all because my whole Geffen Conspiracy theory, if it were true, would have been RAD.
But, sadly, I must focus my partisan rage and indignation inward, and eat worms.
Posted by: Xintra: Kills Seratonin Dead at March 22, 2007 11:31 AM
Oh, if you had been in the remote neighborhood of right it would have rocked. Put down the worms and head over to Almondine for a baby's head-sized meringue.
Posted by: steven at March 22, 2007 11:42 AM
Actually, dallink, there is a vast conspiracy going on re the Obama ad, just not the kind you were thinking of:
http://kurtnimmo.com/?p=807
Muahahahaha!
Posted by: Wayni-ji at March 22, 2007 12:07 PM
Wayni-ji, gotta love a site that puts liberal in scare quotes.
Posted by: steven at March 22, 2007 12:12 PM
Look on the bright side Cintra, I mean at least it wasn't a Vuarnets commercial! Apple was the enemy back then, if you had missed a Vuarnets commercial it would have been like skipping four years of high school English.
What's even more amazing is that I'm sure there' s some roly poly boy named Eugene sitting at his pc in some Madison , Wisconsin suburb who could have made a better video with even more vintage/obscure commercials!
As for Mesquite milf she needs to date that up and coming porn star, Black Angus, at once! Anything to get her out of that aqua silp dress!!
Posted by: Super Diane at March 22, 2007 12:22 PM
I'm not saying you couldn't have spun your way out of a doozy like that, Cintra, but...hoo-wee. Now, go over to your Conspiracy Theory Notepad, cross-out "de Vellis-Hillary" with a fluorescent crayola, and we'll be certainly certain that this one won't rear its head again.
But can the nuts and bolts of the essay be saved and applied to bring down the man who gave earth the scourge of...Keanu Reaves? (he wonders).
Posted by: Ian at March 22, 2007 2:04 PM
Okay. I'm glad you caught yourself (or Steven caught yourself) in time, Cintra, but now, please excuse me as I crawl under my bed and spend approximately three weeks there surrounded by various protective talismans, and possibly armed with an AK-47. The nightmares are coming:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17739868/
Posted by: Ian at March 22, 2007 3:44 PM
In 1984 I was in fourth grade and my first girlfriend, Alexandra Torres, dumped me for Donny Whitley the week after we held hands for the first time at the roller rink, skating to the Peter Cetera song from The Karate Kid. What a bitch.
Posted by: brink at March 22, 2007 7:53 PM
Not to be the one to bring the vampire of Youtube into our living rooms but oh my god, this video is really messed up and I don't say this about many things....
The mom who posted it has left this comment up:
"I'd rather lose an arm or a limb than have black hair and leave an oil slick behind me."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfilLgPB5Sk
...and my self adjustment of cleavage get's removed.
Posted by: SuperAmanda at March 22, 2007 8:27 PM
Oh Amanda, that's just vile. Who knew there were redneck stage parents breeding the next Prussian Blue?
Posted by: steven at March 23, 2007 8:24 AM
given that Gawker would have gone apeshit over it, I think it's our Constitutional duty to post responses here as if we were responding to Gawker's coverage of now-nonexistant piece.
Posted by: eric at March 23, 2007 9:10 AM
CONTRIBUTE TO THE CULTURAL DOGFIGHT